Ah, the holidays—a magical time when your family gathers to share love, joy, and the crushing weight of passive-aggressive comments about you sneaking a glance at your phone during dessert.
But what if I told you there’s a way to quietly get a few tasks done without getting "the look"? If it's your jam, squeeze in a little productivity. Who really relaxes for five days straight anyway?
Read on for a few tips on becoming a holiday stealth worker!
Top Tips For Stealthy Holiday Work
Master the Art of the Bathroom Break
You’re not “checking Slack,” you’re “making room for seconds.” Keep your phone volume off, dim your screen, and make those 15-minute scroll sessions count.
Pro tip: Remember to actually flush. It’s called method acting, folks.
Embrace “Uncle Rob’s Football Rants”
Nobody will notice you typing emails if you’re seated strategically in the corner during Uncle Rob's annual three-hour TED Talk on how “The Lions are for real this year!.” Just nod occasionally and mutter, “Amazing season, huh?”
Make Puzzles Your New Passion
Pull out a 1,000-piece holiday-themed jigsaw puzzle and declare it your new passion. Then “search for edge pieces” while secretly updating spreadsheets. If anyone gets suspicious, just shout, “Found it!”
Feign an Epic Nap
Slip away “to recharge.” But instead of catching Z’s, catch up on email. Everyone will admire your commitment to self-care—and you can admire your inbox going from chaos to calm.
Be the Tech Hero
“Oh no, Grandma’s Wi-Fi is acting up!” What a shame. If you must take 45 minutes to troubleshoot, who could possibly fault your noble efforts? Coincidentally, you’ll also have just enough time to wrap up that proposal.
Take the Dogs for a Walk
Volunteering to walk the dogs is the ultimate stealth move. No one questions it, everyone thinks you’re being generous. Plus you’ve got some quiet time to wish everyone on social media a happy holiday while throwing a tennis ball. The pups get exercise, and you get to connect with your virtual friends. Everyone wins.
Or, maybe don't work? Lock all your devices in the car and give the keys to a trusted friend. Seriously, you deserve a break.
Just kidding, kinda sorta.
Holidays are for connection, but they’re also for maintaining your sanity. If that means sneaking a few minutes of work here and there, so be it. Work isn’t the villain, your unnecessary pressure to not work during the holidays is. If there's something on your mind that's preventing you from unwinding, knock it out and get back to the festivities!
And if anyone asks as you read this, you were double-checking the proper temperature for a roasted duck.
Enjoy some down time!