If the word "networking" makes you want to run and hide, you're not alone. It feels gross for many of us because it's not natural.
It’s this weird mix of awkward smiles, sizing-you-up energy, and questions like “Who helps you with XYZ?” when you’d rather talk about literally anything else.
But what if networking didn’t have to feel that way? What if it wasn’t "networking" at all?
INCOMING HUMBLE BRAG
I'm extremely well-connected in the agency space. If you asked me how I built my network, I'd look at you funny. What? I mean, I didn't "build a network."
But when I really think about it? I’ve got a true confession. I've been networking all along. I just didn’t call it that because that's not how it felt. Because I wasn't handing out business cards and stalking leads. So what was I doing? Read on!
Keys To Cringe-Free Networking
This is weird because I never knew I was networking. But I do it all the time. I'm that annoying people person who talks to strangers in public and, as a result, is constantly making friends.
So, if you avoid networking but need to grow your circle, rejoice! You don’t need to play games or fake your way through small talk. You just need to do a few things consistently and from the heart. Here is what's worked for me:
Show up again and again.
You don’t have to be the loudest or most visible. Just be someone people recognize because you keep showing up. Familiarity builds trust.
Ask real questions.
Skip the business stuff and be curious about them. "What do you do for fun?" "How do you know the host?" "Where are you from?"
Be useful.
Offer a resource, share what helped you, make an intro. Being helpful without expecting anything in return is both memorable and magnetic.
Be human.
Messy, honest, kind. Say when things are tough. Celebrate small wins. Let people see the real you. That’s where the good stuff lives.
Follow up for no reason.
Reach out a week or a month after a conversation just to say hey or share something that reminded you of them. It’s the unexpected check-ins that stick.
Care about the little stuff.
Their dog’s name. That book they mentioned. Their kid’s graduation. It’s not hard, it's fun! Real connections lead to the desire to do things together.
Say the thing nobody else is saying.
When you speak the truth, especially a vulnerable one, you create a deeper connection. It gives people permission to be real with you, too.
Offer space, not solutions.
You don’t always need to fix it. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is listen without jumping in. Just being there is enough.
Be generous with your spotlight.
If you have a following, shine your light on others. Share their wins, recommend them, tag them, and make sure they’re seen. That kind of generosity is rare and always rewarded.
Create places for others to connect.
Whether it’s a call, a thread, or an in-person event, you don’t have to be the center of attention to be the matchmaker. Set the table, set the tone and then get out of the way.
These may sound like common sense, but until this issue, I never really asked how I got here. Hopefully, what worked for me can help you, too. And I'm gonna double down because meeting new people is the best part of my world.
If you’ve made a new friend in our community, found a collaborator, or just felt a little more seen after a rough week, then you already know the power of community. And community thrives with connection. Could you call that networking? I guess you could!
So here’s to building the kind of connections that don’t feel like work.
Less Cringe = More Friends. Every time.